The Participants

Hello! Welcome to The Master Cleanse Blog! A group of people in the New York City area have decided to try this fast together and blog about their experiences. Following are brief bios on the particiants! Thank you for joining us on our journey... of poop!

JEFFREY MARX

I am 30 years old. I started a new diet and gym "system" at the beginning of October. I have lost 17 pounds so far. I want to do The Master Cleanse to kick-start healthier eating habits and to see what weight can be lost. I know that is not what the cleanse is for, and you gain half of it back, but let's say I lose 20 pounds and gain half back.... I just lost ten pounds then, awesome bonus! This past summer, I read 'The Secret' (twice) and have been interested in truly focusing on my physical health. Two years ago, I was in a crazy car accident that really jostled alot of things in my heart and mind. After trying out therapy for a year and a half, I think I have a decent handle on my "brain stuff", now I wanna try my hand at some physical change. I am a receptionist for money, so I will be very close to a bathroom all day. At night I usually have rehearsals or a show or theatre internship or something. I am a performer at Upright Citizen's Brigade Theater and figure, at the very least, this experience and knowledge will be used in a improv scene or sketch down the road.


BETA FIPPEL

Beta has always had a reputation for pushing her body to its limits. From trekking across the entire Inca Trail while doing a handstand to sleeping with fourteen well-hung Turkish men at once on three consecutive nights, she regards her body as a temple of experimentation. But now she thinks it's time to relocate all of the gross things inside her to toilets throughout New York. Her desire to do the Master Cleanse was ignited after reading about it or possible seeing a segment about it on Oprah or The View. She and Dan tried it once for about an hour in August of this year, but it was called off due to inclement weather. Hopefully this time it'll go more smoothly. Or at all.


BRIAN KENNEDY

I am partaking in the Lemonade Diet/Master Cleanse solely for the cleanse half of it, not the diet half. I weigh 185 lbs. I’m 6’5”. I really have no interest in losing weight. Heroin addict sheik is not my style. And while I love the Olsen Twins (Mary Kate, more than that bore Ashley), I do not care to look like them.

I am interested in the cleanse for the following reasons:

1. I love a good challenge.
2. I’m always looking for something good to blog about.
3. Ridding my body of toxins sounds like a positive thing.
4. My liver could use a break from all the excessive drinking I put it through.
5. My checkbook could use a break from all the excessive spending I put it through. And sadly, not spending money on food sounds a lot more plausible than not spending money on American Apparel t-shirts, iTunes, and unnecessary trinkets for the new apartment.
6. According to Wikipedia, Beyonce did the cleanse to prepare for her role in Dreamgirls. I love Beyonce.

Yes, I’m a little worried about the weight loss (although most people gain the majority of it back.) And yes, I’m a little worried about the early morning “oral salt water enema” (dear lord, don’t let me shit my pants on the A train.) However, I am confident that I can do this. Especially, with a little help from my friends. Not because I know that they’ll be right there with me, suffering every step of the way… but because I love a little competition.

DAN FRIEDMAN

Dan Friedman is a 24-year-old unemployed film editor applying to graduate school for playwriting. He has hated his body since he was at least 12, and this diet is revenge.

JON & SOPHIA

Jon and Sophia, or 'The Straights' as I lovingly refer to in my (Jeffrey's) blog, were also going to embark on this journey with us. They recently had their 6 year anniversary! Cute! However, when we asked to start a day early this Sunday, they decided to bail. Quitters before we even started! Here is what Sophia said to me over Gmail Gchat the other day...

I feel the need to apologize. I don't think I will be able to do this. Although my body definitely needs it. Here are my reasons:

1. Red Sox just made the World Series (lots of drinking & stress)
2. Work. Everyone in my office relies on 6 cups of coffee to function. I'm new. I need 12.
3. I'm a cunt if I don't eat carbs for more than 12 hours.
4. I'm a cunt when I don't eat at all... also I get incredible nausea if I don't eat within 12 hours.
5. Me being a cunt & jon being a douche bag due to no food = potential divorce. Since we just put 6 years into this relationship I'm not going to let some lemon & maple syrup get in the way.
6. We're away for a wedding on Sunday and they are serving tacos...

Good Luck!

Jon also wished me luck and urged me to not end up like this guy.